If you buy on Etsy or sell on Etsy here's what I want you to do. Make me laugh. Keep it "G" rated, please! Whoever makes my sides ache the worst from laughter is gettin' the goods. :)The bag will contain some of my handmade jewelry but other things as well. You'll just have to wait and see. ;)
*You must be a member of Etsy.com to participate in this drawing. When you leave a comment with your joke or funny tale you must also leave your Etsy username so that I can contact you for address information if you are the winner.
I'm taking comments until August 29th and will announce the winner here on August 30th!
Spread some much needed laughter. Enter as many times as you wish. Ready, set, GO!
10 comments:
What a fun thing to do, I'll have to think on this for awhile.
Melissa
whats green and brown, has four legs, and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree?
a pool table
(this one is from my husband)
thingsinstuff.etsy.com
Cute idea! When I started Etsy I had no idea what occupational hazards awaited me. Oh sure, I knew to wear safety glass when cutting or drilling, to properly ventilate chemicals, and to be very careful with the blow torch. What no one warned me about was to take care when buying hand lotion. Especially to not buy the tube that is the same size and shape of a tube of industrial epoxy and ABSOLUTELY not to leave them next to each other.
I nearly glued my hands together.
Enjoy, slvrlily
Well this should be FUN!! I can't ever remember any jokes so we will have to go with my REAL life!! About 3 years ago 2 funny things happened to me within a few weeks, the first..I shave my legs & underarms in the shower, so I had just replaced the shaver on the shower shelf, about 5 days into shaving every morning I glanced at my underarms & to my surprise it looked dark???!! I thought , that darn razor is a dud! I looked at it & it looked fine?! well i wear glasses but not in the shower---so when I stepped out I hurriedly put the glasses on & of course you know the answer... i had never removed the cap from the razor & all week had been shaving away...i looked at my legs & yes it was true..stubble everywhere! My friends at work laughed for days when they heard my story...but it gets better...My hair was down to my waist for many years as I was growing it to give to cancer patients for a wig. I, being a previous hairdresser, take pride in shiny, healthy hair, so i always shampoo & condition & buy everything BIG...I keep large pump bottles on each side of the shower, this instance happened the week of my class reunion. Each time I shampooed I naturally conditioner...My shampoo was not its usual lather... each morning I thought....I am growning tired of this shampoo I need to try something different, maybe my hair is getting used to it...well i went to the class reunion that weekend & everyone just raved over how pretty my hair was, as i had a extremely short spikey haircut at the previous reunion, I told them it was not half as shiny & healthy as it used to be, we all thought well maybe i am sick with something causing my hair not to be its norm...well once again the next day when I had my glasses ON & I was cleaning the shower I decided to open the shampoo bottle & smell it...needless to say----it was not the shampoo inside at all---when I had cleaned the shower the previous week---and you know what I am going to say----I replaced the bottles on the wrong sides of the shower...but did not know & continued ALL week to shampoo with the conditioner then condition with the shampoo... One thing is for sure...I did have the softest hair going that week, since I kept adding more to try to achieve a lather!!!...once again my friends just shook their heads each time they saw me at work...but we had a good belly laugh! oh yes, I have also stepped into the shower with my glasses on since (accidentaly) & did not know until they fogged up on me!
Well the last funny thing was just last week---I stepped out of the shower ( I guess this is the funniest room in my home!) got dried off, did the lotion routine, started dressing & stood in front of the mirror & sprayed perfume on, I usually do the once over (neck, wrist) well I looked myself dead in the eyes & took that bottle & sprayed my underarms! What a shocked look I saw on my face, almost immediately I stopped (only did 1 underarm) then I had myself a good laugh! I do not know where that one came from since I use a rollon deodorant & have not used a spray in over 35 years! I think somewhere in my heritage Lucy & Ethel are relatives of mine & it keeps trying to expose itself.
I am sure I have other funnies about me, but this is what makes them at work smile with me!
Someday I need to tell some xhusband jokes...he is my best material! Even he laughs !
Even if I do not win I had smiles while typing this today & smiling gives me a good feeling that will carrying me into this wonderful day!
My absolute favorite joke:
The Washcloth
This has to be read, laughed at and passed on. There is not a woman alive
today who won't crack up over this! I was due for an appointment with the
gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from
the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning
at
9:30 am.
I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already
around 8:45 am.
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to
spare. As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene
when making such visits, but this time I wasn't going to be able to make the
full effort.
So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the washcloth that was
sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in that area to make
sure I was at least presentable.
I threw the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in
the car and raced to my appointment.
I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in.
Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I hopped up on the table, looked
over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in Paris or some
other place a million miles away. I was a little surprised when the doctor
said, 'My, we have made an extra effort this morning, haven't we?'
I didn't respond.After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went
home.The rest of the day was normal . Some shopping, cleaning, cooking.
After school when my 6 year old daughter was playing, she called out from
the bathroom, 'Mommy, where's my washcloth?'
I told her to get another one from the cupboard.
She replied, 'No, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my
glitter and sparkles saved inside it.'
NEVER going back to that doctor ever!!
And...my still empty Etsy shop, lol - ALittleBirdhouse.etsy.com - but I'm getting closer! Hoping to take the upcoming week (woohoo - no mag deadlines!) to load some items and finally open!
OMGosh these are hilarious! My sides are really hurting. I could not get through these last two without stopping to wipe away tears from laughter. :)
Please keep'em coming. Too fun.
And in the meantime I will try to think of something funny from my life to share with you all as well.
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very
Sexy nightie.
'Tie me up,' she purred, 'and you can do anything you want.'
So he tied her up and went golfing.
clippyhut.etsy.com
HAHA, I had not heard that one. Funnnnnny! Thanks for sharing. :)
So my Grandmother on my Father's side is quite a character. My Dad lives in Maryland, my Grandmother in New York so they don't see each other too often. Recently he went up to visit and went to pick her up and take her out. She informed him that she couldn't go out, because it was raining. When my Dad asked why she said "I'm not a strong swimmer."
mynameskatie on Etsy
fun give away!
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Bob has been missing since Friday.
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