Thursday, December 11, 2008

Of the past.

So, in between doing laundry and dishes I got a phone call from a friend that I hear from only about once every 6 months to a year.
She's a friend that I used to be really close to, back in the day. We were inseparable, but the foundation of the friendship was based on clubbing, partying, and having a "good" time. That's about all we had in common.

As time went by and I got older total mom-dom set in. I became a "fuddy duddy", or settled down as the case may be described. I became responsible. I became boring.

My friend however, did not. She is 5 years older than me and about the time I started settling down is when her marriage of 14 years came to and end. She dealt with it by becoming a full fledged party girl in so many ways I can't even begin to tell about .

I was walking a nervous tightrope trying to balance being a wife and mother, and not lose my friend.
As time went on it became apparent that I had to cut ties.
So, I finally explained to her that it was time we parted ways. Nothing personal, but we are just different people now with completely different goals and values. She was living the single life again and I was just starting to figure out that being a mom and a wife wasn't such a bum rap after all.

So, for a couple of years I didn't hear a peep from her. She went on with her life, I went on with mine.
After a time she began calling me again just to say hi and make small talk. But she no longer tried to drag me out to go clubbing. She finally "got it" and accepted my new life. Not only did she get it but she respected it. Now we could be friends again.
She is still a little bit of a partier to this day, just not quite as extreme. And she doesn't try to "convert" me anymore.

Well, fast forward to today...She called me a few minutes ago with such a happy sound in her voice. She called to say that she was baking cookies and that she was going to bring me some- tonight!
This is how it always is. I don't hear a peep from her for months and then boom, I get a call and there she is. I had no idea she would call tonight. The last time I saw her was about 8 months ago, or so.

I think it's real sweet that she thought enough of me to want to make me home made goodies. Real nice indeed. Though I can't help but laugh at how she pops up out of the blue all the time. Or when she sends me funny video phone messages of a turkey dancing, like she did on Thanksgiving day.
I pretty much know she'll send one on Christmas and tell me she loves me. And I know for a fact she will at least text me on Jan. 1st to wish me a happy birthday and happy new year. She's real good that way. She has never forgotten.

Why am I writing all of this? I'm not sure. I guess we'll never be close friends again, but maybe it is ok that she is out there. Out there doing her thing while I am here doing mine. And maybe it's not too unhealthy that she pops in once in a grand while to just touch base.
I know where to find her, she knows where to find me. Maybe that's all there is between us now. But maybe it is enough. :)

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